Irreplaceable-Am I Loved?: Week 3
Am I Loved?
THE MISSING COMPONENT? We have a spiritual enemy who doesn’t care if we die fast or slow. (See John 8:44)
The lies we have dealt with so far:
1. I am worthless, and life is meaningless.
2. I am ruined. I can’t be forgiven, and my life can’t be fixed.
3. This week’s lie: No one cares, and others will be better off without me.
VIDEO WITH LORI PUTMAN:
o “I have hurt others and will hurt more, so I am doing the world a favor.”
o “I am a draw on others, exhausting them. They have so much on them, and I am another thing that stresses someone else. I will make their lives easier. If I really love them, I will make things easier for them by disappearing.”
o “Nobody cares because… they didn’t answer my call, or even notice me gone or struggling.”
• The enemy will help us focus on the few people or one person who doesn’t care—at the exclusion of those who do.
• His goal: hopelessness. The devil creates the gaps and then fills in the gaps with lies.
THINGS TO THINK ABOUT:
1. Your feelings are real, but they are not reality.
o We believe what our thoughts and feelings are saying even though it’s not reality.
o We feel like no one will love us because someone didn’t.
2. We fall for the lie that what we feel now, we will always feel.
o We believe things won’t change, and we have no hope of change. These are assumptions we make.
3. We believe this decision only affects ourselves.
o This is just not true. Suicide not only affects your immediate situation but also every future situation you might have had, including those with others.
4. Christians make mistakes.
o We are all saved by grace through faith. We also know that death by suicide is believing a lie. It’s not God’s will for you nor for others.
• I don’t know whether a person who completed suicide will be in heaven or not, but I do know that death by suicide is not God’s plan. If the enemy is at work, then I know his desire is ruin. What do we know? If I feel or think these kinds of things, it’s a combination of probably several things, but for sure, the enemy is involved.
HOW DO I WALK IN THE LIGHT?
1. Understand reality. There is an enemy. Know how he works. There is light and darkness.
o We are each broken. We have misperceptions, limited understanding, and a sinful nature.
o The devil is seeking to exploit this brokenness by trying to build and fill in the gaps. (See 1 Peter 5:8-11)
2. Choose to walk in the light. (See John 8:12, Psalm 119:105, and 1 John 1:5-7)
o You are fearfully and wonderfully made. God knows you and loves you.
o Each of us have failed, but each of us are still valuable to God. God has a plan for you.
o We have to interject God into the equation.
3. As light and dark battle, we have hope and a future promised to us. (See Jeremiah 29:10-15)
o Context for Jeremiah 29: Because of their circumstances, God’s people felt worthless and ruined—like God didn’t care.
o Some had given up faith. Some were creating false messages.
o This passage shows us that we will stay in the struggle, but there is hope and a future.
o We are eternal, and our situations are temporary.
WITH THIS IN MIND, Let’s prioritize your battle strategy. First: abiding, which includes relationship.
• Put on God’s glasses. (See 2 Corinthians 4:18) How? By walking in the light and abiding in Christ2 so there are no gaps in your relationship with God or His people.
• Take time for relationship—for your own defense and the defense of those around you. (See James 5:16-20)
• Honesty is a priority; you have to go first.
• Have concern and awareness for others around you. (See Galatians 6:2, Jude 20-23)
• Understand your own shortcomings. Who do you bounce your feelings off of to help you decide what is true? (See Proverbs 12:15)
Our goal in this series has been:
• To draw your attention to a real issue, to bring it (and the enemy) into the light.
• To start a conversation that moves into real relationships, relationships that are vulnerable and transparent.
• To challenge you to engage in the battle and to choose your battles.
• To get rid of the stigma. This is real, and dealing with mental illness and suicidal thoughts is an ongoing battle!
QUESTIONS TO REFLECT AND DISCUSS:
Passages to consider: Jeremiah 29:11-13, Philippians 4:8, Romans 12:1-2,9-16
Icebreaker: Which of these shows would you participate in: Survivor or Alone? Why or why not? OR What is your dominate love language?
1. Read Ephesians 2:19, Galatians 6:2, and Romans 12:1-2,9-16. What is God, through Paul, communicating about who He is and who we are? A) What do these passages tell us about being God’s people together?
2. How do you recognize when you are carrying burdens? A) How do you communicate to others that you need connection and perspective? B) How do you recognize when others are carrying burdens?
3. Take a look at Jeremiah 29:11-13, Jeremiah 31:3, John 10:9-11, and Philippians 4:8. What are the kinds of things God speak to us, even when He is convicting us? A) What from these passages can help us recognize the difference between lies and truth?
4. What kinds of lies are you more susceptible to? A) What kinds of lies are those close to you more susceptible to? B) What specifically can help you fight the lies? How specifically can you help someone else fight?
5. What are you doing in this season to strengthen your connection with Jesus? With key people? A) Who do you have in your life where you could ask, “Can you speak some truth into what I am thinking and feeling?”
6. As we conclude this series, what are you more aware of? What response is the Holy Spirit showing you to take?
Resources:
Grieving Suicide – A 30 day devotional for healing after loss and grief