Unforgiveness and Resentment

Psalms 86:5– Bend down, O Lord, and hear my prayer; answer me, for I need your help. Protect me, for I am devoted to you. Save me, for I serve you and trust you. You are my God. Be merciful to me, O Lord, for I am calling on you constantly. Give me happiness, O Lord, for I give myself to you. O Lord, you are so good, so ready to forgive, so full of unfailing love for all who ask for your help.

DEFINITIONS

• Wrong priorities & goals
• Lack of trust
Resentment – bitter indignation at having been treated unfairly.
Indignation – anger or annoyance provoked by what is perceived as unfair treatment.
Forgiveness – to grant pardon for or remission of (an offense, debt)
• to give up all claim on account of a debt
• to grant pardon to (a person)
• to cease to feel resentment against: to forgive one’s enemies
• to cancel an indebtedness or liability of: forgiving a loan

THE ENEMIES PLAYGROUND
• We have an enemy who seeks to kill, steal and destroy
• Hebrews 12:15 – Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many.
• Ephesians 4:26
• The enemy wants you caged by resentment and bitterness

DIFFERENT KINDS OF RESENTMENT
• Resentment for what others have done
• Resentment over comparison
• Resentment over others achievements
• Resentment because of what others have done or how they have treated you or others you love.
• Holding on to resentment is like holding on to your own cage
• A bitter root you feed that poisons the soul

1 Corinthians 10:12 – If you think you are standing strong, be careful not to fall.

FORGIVENESS
What it isn’t:
• Condoning and being ok with what they did (What God thinks)
• Letting people get away with everything and having no boundaries
• Forgiveness & Reconciliation are different
What it is :
• The source comes from God (Romans 6:23)
• Free to the receiver, a high cost to the giver
• Amazing
We need to remember:
• Luke 7:36-48
• You can’t love, forgive, or not resent if you don’t let Jesus forgive you
• You can’t do it alone
• You need connection, healing and God

CLOSING QUESTIONS
1. What are you hearing today?
2. Have you been feeding resentment and bitterness? Who do you need to forgive?
3. Do you need to remember that you have been loved and forgiven much so that you can love and forgive much?
4. Where is your heart like the Pharisee, or the women in tears?
5. Do you need to cry out to Jesus?

QUESTIONS TO REFLECT AND DISCUSS:
Passages to consider: Hebrews 12:14-15; Matthew 18:15-17; Ephesians 4:32, Colossians 3:12
Ice Breaker: Have you ever had someone unexpectedly or anonymously pay for something? OR When have you been surprised by the size of a bill? (big or small) What from the sermon was particularly meaningful to you?
1. Read Psalm 103:6-12 & Luke 7:36-50. What do you see in these passages about God, people and forgiveness?
2. What helps you remember the forgiveness God has given you? What have you learned about yourself when it comes to forgiveness and unforgiveness?
3. Look are Hebrews 12:14-15 & Ephesians 4:29-32. How do you recognize when you are functioning with unforgiveness, resentment or bitterness? What have you noticed about this area in the midst of your relationships with family, close friends, co-workers, or neighbors?
4. Forgiveness is like a one-way street – you can choose forgiveness. Reconciliation is a two-way street – it takes both parties involved to bring reconciliation. What helps you move, in your own attitude, from unforgiving to forgiving in the midst of your relationships? What can be stumbling blocks in your journey of forgiving?
5. Challenge: For the next 30 days, work to spend time daily – slowly reading over Matthew 6:9-13 and praying it back to your Heavenly Father. It will take about 5 minutes. Look to see what God does in your heart and relationships.
6. Through this series what has God shown you about “home wreckers” in your home sphere? What is your next steps in response to Him?
Passages to prepare for next week- New Series for Easter – Resurrected! 1 Cor. 15: 1-8; Acts 2:3; 4:2, 33; Romans 1:4; 1 Peter 3:21
Resources: https://www.bettermarriages.org/for-couples/learning/book-reviews/the-five-languages-of- apology/ and https://www.5lovelanguages.com/quizzes/apology-quiz/